I fear my own inadequaces. I also fear I spelled that word wrong. But sorry english major friends, i'm not going to spell check it.

I find girls especially scary, especially ones i like, if i like a girl, being around her turns my brain into jello, and what little wit and charm i can sometimes manage goes out the door. and while drinking gives some guys courage in a situation like this, I think it just makes me annoying, or neurotic. probably a bit of both. I don't really find my-self attractive enough, successful enough, and definentally not rich enough to impress much of anyone. i'm not really depressed about this, just frustrated. i'm not realy the sort of person to be nervous as a center of attention, i do play in bands. and have acted. i guess it's cause without my saxophone to hide behind, I don't feel like i'm that interesting a person. ohh well, this is just me venting some nerves.. only time will tell.

tommorrow is going to be more cookies, if i get up early enough, and find enough ambition. it could be a lot of cookies.. but we shall see. I hung out with austin today, and despite the bar scene not really exsisting on a wednesday night, we had a rather fun evening. beer and pool, followed by round the clock diner. we even got to sit with the emo kids at Round the Clock.

Also because i haven't expounded on it at all on my blog, Jesus was a Zombie. No there is no direct reference of him eating brains, but that is not a requirement of zombieism. Only that you died, and were brought back from the dead. Both of which christianity claimed jesus did. Making the son of Mary and Joseph a zombie.

Zombie Jesus compels me to sleep. Easter and Halloween are about the same thing... think that over.